People often ask - why can't we all just get along and live in a conflict-free society? The fact is people have always
dealt with conflict, and researchers have found it to be prevalent in every area of human relations.
There are several reasons why people have disputes. There are cultural differences, gender differences,
scarce resources, inequalities, religious differences, style differences, incompatible goals, and that's just the beginning.
Additionally, a number of studies, suggest that at least 10% of the U.S. population has some sort of personality disorder.
That includes depression, bipolar disorder, and borderline personality disorder, to name a few.
In the workplace, it gets even worse. There are bullies, jerks who want to stab you in the back, and
folks you just plain don't like. My personal favorite are people who are passive aggressive--they openly agree to something and then do the opposite. We also have managers and supervisors
who micro-manage, cannot communicate in a constructive manner, may not be as intelligent as their staff, and they use the decision
to fire as an early impulse instead of the last option; creating lawsuits and EEO complaints.
Employees compete for promotions, raises, and recognition. There are conflicts between employees and
their bosses, bosses and their bosses, intragroup and intergroup conflict, among executive staffs, boards of directors, divisions
and programs for funding...it goes on and on.
In fact, the workplace is a veritable
petri dish for conflict. It makes you wonder how anything gets done at all. One might think that in the company agency, conflict
may be the very essence of what the organization is about, and if conflict isn’t happening then the organization has
no reason for being. One survey reported that over 85% of workers reported conflict at work.
Just as unresolved conflict can spread through an entire family, it can also affect a whole organization, reaching
far beyond the principal parties. The continual avoidance of a problem can seep throughout the organization, affecting everyone
who interacts with each other. This causes employees to take sides, waging a campaign discrediting the other group; thus setting
destructive forces in motion that decrease productivity, and lower morale.
The recognition
of the prevalence of conflict at work has led to mediating and arbitrating conflict in the workplace. Negotiation occurs in
conflict resolution when the parties recognize their interdependence, have been able to establish their concerns, are willing
to work on both incompatible and overlapping goals, have been able to establish enough power balance so people can come to
the table, and when procedures are in place so people can talk to each other in problem-solving ways.
Thus, we think of negotiation as the active phase of conflict resolution when people generate options,
brainstorm ideas, give and take, and attempt to get their mutual goals met. Negotiation can be either competitive, “I
want my goals met, and I don’t care about yours” or collaborative “We have to reach a mutually satisfying
conclusion. Negotiating involves active engagement, not avoidance.
Remember that
conflict in general isn't necessarily a bad thing. If it's open, respectful and direct, it helps in dealing with issues
and building consensus. Fortune 500 companies are famous for having a culture that embraces conflict. It's called "constructive confrontation," and it's helped Intel to become the world's most powerful chip company.
At DecisionOne we are leaders in an emerging field that integrates people issues and business issues
through the lens of conflict management, organizational effectiveness, leadership, and dispute systems. We know business,
we know people, and we know how to work with you to help you work better. Contact us for a free consultation at 573 - 632-2020
